Friends on this roller coaster

Where shall I begin? I'm going to try this blog thing Again. But I feel like I probAbly won't have much to say. I don't really know where to start, I have looked over a few blogs tonight and I get the feeling that it's pretty much whatever you want to say, hence it's "your blog". (I kno I'm such a rocket scientist for that observation.) So I'll just write whatever comes to mind. Now having said that I'll start with a little update on what's been going on with me over the past year. I am still with my "new job". I finally upgraded my living situation not because of the job but because a cousin decided that he would help me out while he went overseas, so I am very grateful to him for that. I love love, love my cousin. I can never repay him for what he has done for me and my family. Now to get on with the topic at hand for my blog...friends on this roller coaster. If there is anything that I cherish aside from my family, it my true friendships. I have ladies in my life that I have known for 20+ years and some for just a couple. But what I have noticed is it doesn't matter how long you have known someone, it's just about the connection, the realness, how each values the friendship, the honesty, the loyalty and that family-like quality that you get from that person. I have been going through some changes lately and I have had to step outside myself a few times to learn a couple lessons, I was too blind to see. I almost lost a 20+ yr old friendship over what we have come to the conclusion of calling "a non issue turned issue over miscommunication". And that is truly what sums it up. We both were too stubborn to talk to each other. We would see each other and be cordial, but in the back of both of our heads we were thinking "why is this Heffa talking to me?" I'm thinking we should be cool because I apologized for a blow-up, and she was thinking we have a situation that was never resolved, and that is what we should discuss. The point to my rambling is very simple, no matter what life throws at you, communication is always the key to any breakthrough. Don't ever let pride stand in the way of getting to the bottom of any situation. Don't ever assume that things are a certain way unless you have done your research. My situation could have easily been avoided had I approached her a year ago. It could have been solved had I not assumed that the situation was at the point where it was because she had an issue with me. All the frustrations of taking each others comments the wrong way could have been avoided had we just sat down and said "wtf?" Decades of being friends was being tarnished and drug into the ground all because we felt the other person was upset over some unknown issue. It's all real elementary. Grown women unable to properly communicate resulting in child-like behavior. As a friend told me "If you value the friendship that you have with her, call her and work it out, before it is too late." I almost didn't take that advice because I felt like I didn't have the issue so why should I contact her to find out why she has an issue with me. Where do they do that at? No no no! You got a problem you need to be a women and come to me and state so. But I went ahead and made the call, well text. We had a sit-down and situation is now clear. Now whether it's too late to repair the damage remains to be seen. Well stay tuned for my crazy roller coaster rides with friends. Until next time...

NEW JOB

Ok so I started a new position. And let me say it is a breath of fresh air. I finally have an office. I can lay out my stuff and lock it up. No more lugging my files back and forth because I dont want someone looking over them. I feel great!

I get sad when I go out to inspect and I see my housekeepers all sad missing me. If I could of held on to my position and stayed with my housekeepers, I would have definitely stayed with them.

It was a task getting them used to the way i wanted things to go. I had to fight everyday with someone. If it wasn't the fact that I was pushing the english issue they were fighting the change in standards that i was setting.

After it was all said and done, I created a nice bond with them. It was a long year, and I can't say that I enjoyed it all but I can say that I do truly miss actually being there for them.

Unfortunately, they have to deal with a manager that needs to get fired. I have no idea how or why she is still there. I couldn't change it and that is why i made the decision to make the change to remove myself.

Now I am happy. I want to go to work again. and the bonus is that my old manager now has to answer to me and I know that kills her inside. I have moved on and she can't make me feel like i may lose my job. I stopped wanting to work. I didn't care if I was on time or even there.

I was having anxiety attacks and just didn't want to move.

Now I can start fresh. I have opened the doors to a new adventure. And i know that good things will come eventually. I just have to have patience.

Looking forward

I always find myself content with  the current. Never looking forward. I have no problem looking backwards, so why can't I look forward. My husband always looks forward. He says "Just because I think we have something we don't." Meaning just because I see we got a few bucks in the bank, doesn't mean I need to spend it. We need to keep a saftey net.

I am the complete opposite. I feel like we need to worry about now and not later. I have learned these past couple of years that his statement is oh so true.

Had I let him create that nest egg, a lot of the things I went thru would have never happened. I really miss my house. I am not used to living in cramped quarters and it pains me that I can't afford to move us back into what we are used to.

I know that eventually, change will come and we will get our life back to how it was. I just have to learn that looking forward is whats best. I am trying. Its a task but I will make it happen.

Unfortunate event!

Well here I sit, thinking to myself if i really want to do this whole blog thing. I really don't know where to start or what I should say. I guess whatever comes to mind would be great.

So yesterday I found out a cousin was stabbed 8x with a slash to the back of his neck. Unfortunately he didn't make it even an hour after surgery. Another life taken, for what? I just dont get it. If you gotta fight, fight! No guns, no knives, no bats or clubs. Just ya fists!

I don't care what kind of life a person leads, no one deserves to have their life taken by another. I really hope the police in this valley really try hard to find the killers. Yes killers! They revealed that the stab wounds came from different knives. How crazy is that? So it wasn't good enough for one person to stab him, others had to join in to make sure he was a "dead man."

I am gonna stop my rant for now. Considering this is my first, I think I did ok. Hopefully this will allow me to tap into my creative side.

always keeping it 100,

Chanel